2025-12-09 • 10 min read • Service Delivery Leadership

What I Actually Look for in Leaders

You can read dozens of leadership books and still not know whether your boss is any good. Most frameworks are either too abstract (“be authentic!”) or too narrow (“here’s how to run a 1:1”). Here is a list of traits I actually look for when evaluating leaders - whether I’m hiring, promoting, or figuring out if the person above me is worth following.

How to use this:

Go through the list honestly
Count how many apply
50% or more → good leader
75% or more → very good leader
90% or more → you’re looking at someone exceptional

The Traits

Foundations / Attitude

Gets to the root of things, the real need, the real problem, the real cause.
Knows that different problems need different tools and different approaches.
Can tell signal from noise.
Thinks beyond the next weeks, understands second-order effects.
Designs (pragmatically) so things can evolve, not rot.

Self-management

Takes ownership
Knows their own biases and keeps them in check.
Knows what they stand for and where their boundaries are.
Stays consistent in tough times; doesn’t turn into the opposite of who they are when pressure hits.

Company

Understands what the company is about. If it clashes with their values, they don’t pretend to be the right leader for it.
Understands how the business works, what the client/user needs, and what the direction is.
Commits to the company direction

Managing Individuals

Hires people who actually fit and deliver.
Knows their people what drives them, what blocks them, what they’re truly capable of. Knows when and how to engage them
Has patience; knows when to step back and let someone work things out.
Knows when it’s time to part ways and handles good-byes well.
Keeps compensation fair, doesn’t play games.
Gives trust when it matters, but expects commitments to be kept. Holds people accountable.
Plays fair. Promotes what deserves to be promoted. Doesn’t confuse activity with contribution.
Grows leaders, not followers.

Managing Teams

Sets up how the team actually works, not how it “should look on paper.”
Ensures alignment, everyone knows what matters now and why.
Actively scans for team problems, gaps, missing skills, blockers, and deals with them instead of hoping they disappear.
Makes decisions without waiting for perfect evidence.
Uses process where it helps not everywhere by default.
Unblocks people fast; never becomes the bottleneck.
Handles conflict directly and constructively.
Moves fast even if imperfect; cuts scope when necessary.
Understands the cost of delay.
Focuses on outcomes, not contractual origami.

Communication

Stays humble, listens, pays attention to context.
Owns their mistakes and communicates them clearly without acrobatics.
Speaks in plain, common language, no buzzword armor.
Brings clarity when things are ambiguous.
Says what needs to be said; gives honest feedback; challenges assumptions.
Explains decisions openly, not defensively.

What to Do With This

If you’re working with someone who scores below 50% - and they have no appetite for more - you might want to reconsider how much of yourself you’re investing there. The red flag isn’t the score itself. It’s when someone disagrees with the feedback, doesn’t work on themselves, and genuinely believes they’re doing great. That combination rarely changes. Your time is finite.

If you manage a team and spot some of these traits in an individual contributor — even if they’d only hit 30% today — consider giving them a shot at leadership. Some people pick up these behaviors fast once they’re in the role. But here’s the key: run the experiment in real but controlled conditions. Don’t make the transition feel like a one-way ticket. If it doesn’t work out, stepping back shouldn’t mean their career is over. That safety net makes the experiment possible.

If you’re already in a leadership role and see gaps in yourself — good. That’s the first step. The fact that you’re even evaluating yourself against a list like this puts you ahead of most. Work on it. Better late than never. Seriously.

Bonus: How to Verify These in Recruitment

If you’re hiring leaders, here’s how I’d test for each trait. Please keep in mind that this is just some indicative information and you should verify that constantly after hiring. Some can’t be verified in a single conversation - that’s noted.

Foundations / Attitude

Gets to the root of things, the real need, the real problem, the real cause.

Tell me about a situation where everyone around you was convinced they knew what the problem was – and you decided that couldn’t be true. What was the very first thing you did?
I’ll give you a problem. Tell me three different possible real causes that could be behind it – and how you would find out which one is actually true.

Knows that different problems need different tools and different approaches.

Describe a decision where the best possible action was to do nothing for a while. How did you realise that doing nothing was the right move?
I’ll give you two problems. You have a week for the first one and one hour for the second. How does your approach differ?

Can tell signal from noise.

Here’s a pile of information. What is the very first thing you ignore – and why?

Thinks beyond the next weeks, understands second-order effects.

You’re facing a decision that gives you a quick win but also carries a real risk that it will come back to bite you in six months. What would you do to check whether that “boomerang” is real?
Describe a decision you made not because it was good right now, but because it protected your future options.

Designs (pragmatically) so things can evolve, not rot.

I’ll give you a relatively simple problem and you propose a solution. Then I tell you: “In six months the requirements will change a lot.” What do you change in your solution?

Self-management

Takes ownership.

Tell me about a situation where your decision was wrong, but someone else paid the price. What did you do?

Knows their own biases and keeps them in check.

In what kind of situation does your first impression usually mislead you? How did you discover that?
What’s something you thought about someone after your first conversation that turned out to be completely wrong? What did that reveal about you?

Knows what they stand for and where their boundaries are.

Tell me about a situation where someone asked you to do something that was “not you”. What did you do?

Stays consistent in tough times; doesn’t turn into the opposite of who they are when pressure hits.

(unable to verify on a recruitment call)

Company

Understands what the company is about. If it clashes with their values, they don’t pretend to be the right leader for it.

Has it ever happened that an organisation wanted to promote you and you said no? Why?
What kind of “success” would be a warning sign to you that the company is heading in the wrong direction?

Understands how the business works, what the client/user needs, and what the direction is.

Tell me about the business model of your previous company and what the main needs of your users/customers were.

Commits to the company direction.

Tell me about a decision you didn’t like but still worked on as if it was yours.

Managing Individuals

Hires people who actually fit and deliver.

Tell me about someone you hired because of something that wasn’t on their CV – and it turned out to be a great decision.
Tell me about a person you didn’t hire, even though they were impressive. Why?

Knows their people – what drives them, what blocks them, what they’re truly capable of. Knows when and how to engage them.

Tell me about a person who had potential they couldn’t see in themselves – and what you did so they could see it before you started “helping” them.

Has patience; knows when to step back and let someone work things out.

Tell me about a situation where you deliberately waited instead of stepping in, so that someone could work out the solution themselves.

Knows when it’s time to part ways and handles good-byes well.

Who was the hardest person for you to let go of, even though you knew it was the right step?
How many people have you actually fired?

Keeps compensation fair, doesn’t play games.

Is there a situation where someone on your team should earn more than you? When?

Gives trust when it matters, but expects commitments to be kept. Holds people accountable.

How do you keep track of what your team is actually doing?
What do you do when someone breaks a promise for the second time?

Plays fair. Promotes what deserves to be promoted. Doesn’t confuse activity with contribution.

Give an example of a person whose work wasn’t visible, but was crucial. What did you do about it?

Grows leaders, not followers.

How many leaders have you grown? How did you develop them so that they no longer needed you?

Managing Teams

Sets up how the team actually works, not how it “should look on paper.”

How do you recognise how a team actually works, as opposed to how everyone says it works?

Ensures alignment, everyone knows what matters now and why.

When was the last time you removed something from the “important list of activities” so that people could truly focus on what matters?

Actively scans for team problems, gaps, missing skills, blockers, and deals with them instead of hoping they disappear.

What are three signs that tell you a team is starting to rot?

Makes decisions without waiting for perfect evidence.

Tell me about a decision you made before you felt ready – and why it needed to be made then.

Uses process where it helps, not everywhere by default.

What rule/principle/process have you removed recently?

Unblocks people fast; never becomes the bottleneck.

How do you recognise that you are the bottleneck – before people tell you?

Handles conflict directly and constructively.

When was the last time you told someone on your team something they really didn’t want to hear?

Moves fast even if imperfect; cuts scope when necessary.

I give you a scope of work to deliver. What would you cut first?

Understands the cost of delay.

When was delay worse than a bad solution – and how did you realise that?

Focuses on outcomes, not contractual origami.

What have you done recently that looked like a mistake until people saw the actual result?

Communication

Stays humble, listens, pays attention to context.

Tell me about a situation where the most important decision was made by someone who understood the context better than you. How did you realise they saw it more clearly?

Owns their mistakes and communicates them clearly without acrobatics.

Tell me about one of your mistakes in a single sentence.

Speaks in plain, common language, no buzzword armor.

(just verify their language during the whole recruitment call)

Brings clarity when things are ambiguous.

(unable to verify on a recruitment call)

Says what needs to be said; gives honest feedback; challenges assumptions.

What’s the last thing you told someone important that they really didn’t want to hear?

Explains decisions openly, not defensively.

Think of the last decision you communicated that some people disagreed with. How exactly did you explain it? Which options did you tell them you had rejected, and why?